how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.