im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
