South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
