As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
