could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
