its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize