why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
These tits shall not be calmed
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
