I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
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Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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