p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
