stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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