no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
