is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize