why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize