i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize