i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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