A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
