is your mom at the bar?
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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