The beer is more important than you right now.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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