butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
