If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
