some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
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