I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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