i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
