We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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