their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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