I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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