Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
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