"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
