I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
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