Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
