You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
