Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Randomize
