Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
