I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
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