well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
This is the high leading the old right now
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
