I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
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