I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
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