hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize