How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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