I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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