I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
