bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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