I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Randomize
