Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Randomize
