You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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