Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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