R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Randomize
