he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
