yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
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Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
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Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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