I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Randomize
