Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Randomize
